Self and Others

I am experiencing another burnout, another period of extreme weariness. I tried to let it slide, but I have to admit that part of it may due to the fact that a person possibly questioned me whether I ever listened to and tried to understand her, rather than offered advice and my opinion. I know that deep inside I think that there is no way I can understand this person because of all she is experiencing right now. However, I also questioned myself whether I put into the effort of understanding. What's the fine line between understanding, care, and advice really? For everything you say, it is inevitable that you are expressing your opinion, no matter how neutral you wish it was. But, the speaker may not necessarily demand you to follow his/her opinion. Or very often, the speaker know that the other party is not going to follow. I guess those "opinions" are the central beliefs that we hold on to.

Sometimes, I ponder since when have I not articulated my inner, true feelings? I do not know. In my impression, I think the expressive one was far back when I was in Form 4 or Form 5. I guess the primary ways for me to express my emotions now are: laugh and cry. Is it really that important to examine why we feel a certain way? Or in fact, when we think we have found the right reason, to what extent is it true? How important is it to explain ourselves, explain how we feel? And after the explanation, how much should we expect others to understand? And what about those who don't explain themselves? Are they expected not to be understood then?

Questions, to me, are ways of reflection. When I ask a question, I let you control your answer. And you have the right to decide your own answer, unlike a statement. A question is meant to be communicative as it requires an answer to make the conversation meaningful. A question is not meant to be a sign of suspect or mistrust. I-statement is very powerful. Classic example: I love you. A bunch of I-statements gave ma a headache.

You see?